Laguna Beach: The Real Story

I just watched Laguna Beach, one of those shows that’s supposed to be a guilty pleasure. By all means I should have enjoyed the program — facilitating the experience were Sapporo Ichiban Beef Flavored Ramen and C++: The Core Language. (For the unaware, television, ramen, and computer programming are a geek’s holy trinity)

Yet if it weren’t for the ramen and the C++, dare I say that watching 15 minutes of Laguna Beach would have brought me negative utility! Even after removing the embarassment factor of revealing to all passersby that I felt the urge to watch this teenage-girl-targeted faux-reality TV show, I still would have enjoyed another blubbering MAD TV rerun over this programming. Damn! What went wrong?

The trouble with Laguna Beach is that, as far as I can tell, nothing actually happens during the show. I may not have been paying close enough attention, but I don’t recall whether any characters made any appearances. From time to time, I could hear the sound of concurrent female whines emanating from the television speaker — shall we refer to these sounds as dialogue? Okay, I’ll cede that point. Occasionally I heard some dialogue.

Analysis of this “dialogue” led me to several conclusions:

  • The directors told the actresses to ad lib their conversation
  • The actresses are not very smart

Laguna Beach is no guilty pleasure. It doesn’t give you that good pain feeling. It doesn’t even give you that bad pain feeling, since at least bad pain captures your attention. This show is just boring.

24 Responses to “Laguna Beach: The Real Story”

  1. Cortnee Says:

    first off, if u dont like Laguna Beach jus plain out dont watch it. Laguna Beach is an awesome show and im sure more than one person agrees with me. I dont know what you’re watching but LB is the shiz.

    > Cortnee

  2. Anonymous Says:

    This show does seriously suck.

  3. anonymous Says:

    Yes, I agree. This show is complete garbage and should be watched by no one. Even though there clearly is a set plot, many people seem to think that there are cranes of equipment that just follow people around and the people don’t notice?

    It is a terrible show. All people with average or above intelligence avoid this show. What does that tell you about the viewers?

  4. chuck Says:

    Like, oh my God, I was like so amped to see the first episode of season 2!

    Seriously though, my wife had been watching some of the first season recently and went out and rented them all on DVD. I didn’t want to watch it, but I did….it was a bit addicting for a while there. I am glad I’ve over come the addiction now.

  5. Drew Says:

    OMG, You guys that say laguna Beach is Stupid, Yall are just plain ignorant!!!!! Laguna Beach is The Best Show Im liKe so Obsessed! It is MY whole Towns Guilty Pleasure…(EVEN THE FOOTBALL PLAYERS)!!!!!!! So All you lonely ppl who have nothing else to do except down Todays Society Need To Go Jump!

  6. TX Guy Says:

    That show is easily the MOST Retarded show ever on the face of the earth. I mean people who watch that shit must have a mind exactly like those retarded ass actors/spoiled ass kids. who would give them a show just to glorify them god dam. oh and any guy who watches this show and actually likes it must be a freaking Queer. yea that means you and your gay butt budys andrew.

  7. Shayna Says:

    If you dont like dont watch it- simple as that

  8. Colin Says:

    Laguna Beach is all scripted.

  9. aimee Says:

    OMG!!! evryone disin’ laguna has no life. they have no right talking about the cast members . theres no prob with being obsessed about a show period!!!!!!

  10. JayHow Says:

    Laguna Beach shows us the core values of many american teenagers of the current generation. Money, drama, beauty, and emotional expression. Any person with an average IQ can see how incredibly stupid LB makes us look. And the sad thing is, there are people that actually do act as obliviously stupid as the cast of LB. For instance, i saw part of an episode where the character Jason trys to break up with his girl friend LC…and it was really painful to watch. Jason didn’t say much, he just stared and LC and smiled politely, like he was posing for the camera…and occasionally he’d mutter stupid catch phrases like “This isn’t going to work out?”…and LC would say”Why Jason?? What did i do?” and then Jason would reply”I dunno…”…like he was fricken 5 years…Watching Laguna Beach is like watching a new breed of people with a paris hilton, I can be successful with vanity, type mentality…go F yourself Laguna Beach

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  15. s-kog Says:

    Non of u guys even know shit…….i live there, its not what obviously MTV tries to portray….dont blame the ppl, sure the picked the fakest, stupidest, most self obsessed ppl in my town, but no reason to diss on the town. The show is crap, it ruined the image of my town, and MTV most of all is the fuckin bad-guy here……and im sorry i really am, but those of u who are “obsessed” with the show really need to get a fucking life! get off ur couches and do something that isnt watching ppl in my city live their life, or really what MTV want our lives to look like.
    …..the show isnt scripted just highly influenced by the devil aka MTV
    believe me cause i know lot more than u idiots who watch the fuckin show, i live it

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  24. aya Says:

    hi
    my name is aya
    i’m 14 years old
    i’m from lebanon
    i love this show very much (laguna beach)
    and i love the actors in laguna beach so plz send me a message and add me: yaya_bybk@hotmail.com
    plzzzzzzzzzzz bye

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